28: Stir My Soul

24 Feb

I’ve been thinking.  Always a dangerous thing, but in this instance, I think it may be good.   One of the numerous thing I’ve been really contemplating is why I haven’t been singing much lately.  At all, really.  Which saddens me, because music truly is my saving grace.  I turn to it when nothing else can pull me up out of the depths that my brain drags me into.   When I begin to wonder how people do it.  How they face each day with a smile on their face, a skip in their step?  How they even pull themselves out of bed?  Some turn to religion, exercise, meditation, drugs.  I turn to my children.  My husband.  My books.  And music.  The music that stirs my soul and says all the things I wish I could say, so eloquently put to a melody. 

That being said, I think I haven’t been performing because of the type of performing I was doing wasn’t fulfilling my soul.  I talked before about some of my past musical experiences, none of which I would trade for the world, and certainly they are some of my proudest accomplishments in life.  But where I feel the pull to lay my heart out on the line, and bare my soul, is most often in acoustic music.  Which is a BIG problem since I don’t play the guitar.  I do play the piano (my parents keep trying to get me to move “my” piano out of their house. I’m not quite sure why I haven’t, to be honest).   

It’s time.  It’s time to either learn to play the guitar, move my piano here, or pair up with someone who can accompany me.  I have too much in me that’s just aching to get out.   Even if I just sit around in my living room and cover the songs of those songwriters who I consider my own personal Jesus, it must be done. 

I understand (and totally respect) that people have varied musical tastes, and what moves me, may not move you.  Hell, you may not even like it.  But in an attempt to share with you the type of music that stirs my soul, below are some of my current and past obsessions. 

Stupid Boy by Sarah Buxton with Jedd Hughes

Space by Sarah Buxton with Jedd Hughes

A  Matter of Minutes by Shawn Colvin [I don’t normally like to post videos that stream the lyrics– I much prefer live performances, but in this instance, the lyrics are SO important, I wanted to make sure they could be clearly understood.]

And just to show that I don’t ONLY love ballads…..Sara Bareilles’ stripped down version of Many the Miles.

I’ve passed the point in my life where my dream of being a successful singer will ever come to fruition.  And in all honesty, I don’t think I have the drive necessary to ever make it do so.  Or “the look”.  I just want to sing.  For me.  For my sanity.  For my soul.  Any accompanists out there?  Who don’t mind jamming out in a messy house, full of screaming kiddos, and the Disney Channel on 24/7?  That’s not too much to ask….right?


Posted by on February 24, 2010 in Uncategorized


8 responses to “28: Stir My Soul

  1. Cyndi

    March 3, 2010 at 12:01 am

    I LOVE SB and this version of Many The Miles is amazing! I think it’s a great idea to pair up with someone else. Then you don’t have to worry about learning a new instrument or moving the piano and can just SING! Wish I could accompany you but sadly my talent lies in singing alone in the car. 🙂

    • Jessica

      March 4, 2010 at 6:01 pm

      Cyndi: We can just add Sara B. to our list of people to meet then. I think she’s brilliant!

  2. Jenny

    March 3, 2010 at 8:07 pm

    It is surprisingly easy to learn to play the guitar. It is near-instant gratification. I’m not a singer of your calibre, but I really missed singing after I went to college, and getting a guitar and learning to play it helped so much. Honestly, if I can do it, you totally can. Easy-peasy.

    • Jessica

      March 4, 2010 at 6:02 pm

      Thanks for the encouragement, Jenny. First step–I need to get a guitar:) Maybe I should get my daughter one for her birthday next week. I’m sure she’d let me borrow it, LOL.

  3. shortmama

    March 3, 2010 at 10:00 pm

    Wait a minute….there are people out there that face their days with a smile on their faces and a spring in their step??? I am so not one of those people

    • Jessica

      March 4, 2010 at 6:03 pm

      LOL! I’m so glad it’s not just me! BUT….today the sun is shining and I feel SO much better about life.

  4. DeAnna

    March 4, 2010 at 12:59 am

    It is so crazy insane that you posted this.

    I swear on my children I have been aching for the same exact thing (scouts honor).

    I have not been singing at all, and I couldn’t really figure out why. I had just lost my mojo, my passion for my one true love,..and then it hit me just with in the last few months. I realized I want to make raw passionate spiritually moving music. The same kind of music I myself love so much, that touches me on a cerebral level and has made me “feel” more than another other kind, Acoustic.

    Seriously, I have looked into private guitar lessons for this reason alone. I must find an outlet. Its building in me.

    I say we do it together, it would be a nice motivational tool for the both of us.

    • Jessica

      March 4, 2010 at 9:01 pm

      Dee- we always have made such sweet music together;) I reallly wish I had a recording of us singing our famed doot that I could post so that people could see your greatness. Speaking of greatness—-I ran across your CD of songs the other day. GENIUS!


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